Howdy and Happy Thursday! First things first—CONGRATULATIONS to Andrea Lewis for winning our Beehive Cheese x Tea Zaanti tasting box! Don’t want to miss out on our next giveaway? Become a paid subscriber to be automatically entered! Plus, it brings you good karma and a whole lotta other great W4D benefits.
SOUTHERN FIRE CRACKERS ARE YOUR NEW SNACKING ADDICTION
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EK: Remember those ranch-flavored oyster crackers? Well they’ve been reborn as Fire Crackers or Alabama Fire Crackers.
My friend and Southern food expert Sheri Castle wrote about them in a Southern Living article last fall that was entitled “The South’s Most Beloved Appetizer Starts with a Sleeve of Saltines.” She wrote that “In some hometowns, baby and bridal showers feel incomplete without a tray of these crackers on the buffet.”
Anthony, this was not an appetizer that I grew up with in my part of the South, nor have I ever seen it served anywhere in the South—how about you?
AU: I feel like I remember my grandmother on my Dad’s side making them with oyster crackers (when she wasn’t making Texas Trash). But I think they’re more of a Gulf Coast delicacy. LA Times cooking columnist, Ben Mims, who hails from Mississippi wrote them up as one of his favorite salty snacks to have with cocktails.
EK: I know Sheri Castle well, and I trust her, so it must be a bigger thing in Alabama. Regardless, Fire Crackers are a culinary treasure—low brow as they may be. They are easy to make, and they are deliciously addictive. Once you start eating them, it’s really difficult to stop.
It’s funny how “pop culture” recipes create a critical mass. About eight months ago I started seeing packaged Fire Crackers at the cash register of a couple of gourmet food stores, and then a few people I know started talking about them. The fried saltines served with crab dip at a few local restaurants became cousins to the Fire Cracker by adding seasonings like Old Bay, and a few versions popped up on social media.
Next, some friends asked me if I had a recipe for them. I told them the only recipe that I knew of was the one that used oyster crackers, plus dried dill and the Ranch Seasoning and Salad Dressing Mix.
AU: Isn’t that the other Southern Holy Trinity??? :)
EK: LOL! YES! So, the first time that I made them, I used Ranch seasoning, eliminated the dill and added red chile flakes and white pepper. I added a little sugar to balance all the savory, and highly recommend that addition because it is like adding salt to desserts—it makes all the difference in the flavor.
If you like Cool Ranch Doritos, you will LOVE these. They are crunchy and filled with pure Ranch goodness, plus a kick from the pepper and chile.
Next, I decided to see if I could make them from scratch with a little different flavor profile. My thought was that I could season them with Old Bay, Italian herbs, Asian flavors, etc. and besides, I love a culinary challenge!
I had my snacking orders: Could I create a Fire Cracker that had all the rich salty umami and addictiveness of the Ranch Fire Crackers without the seasoning packet? Turns out it was easier than I thought it would be!
EK: The secret ingredient that keeps you coming back for more is dry buttermilk powder. That is the flavor that you can’t quite put your finger on and makes them addictive. For my experiment, I used Italian seasonings, crushed red chile flakes, white pepper, dried garlic and onion powder and the dry Buttermilk powder.
Fire Crackers are traditionally made with Saltine crackers that are marinated for a period of time in oil and dry Ranch powder and chile flakes in a re-closeable bag. I believe that they got their name from the addition of red chile flakes which supply the “fire” flavor.
They defy logic by absorbing all of the oil and the seasonings and remain dry. The first time I made them, I was sure that they weren’t going to work, but they did!
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EK: I used a little less oil than many recipes that you can find on the internet, and I used better oils, a mix of avocado oil and EVOO. I also used an extra sleeve of crackers to make sure that all the oil and the seasonings were absorbed.
AU: I’ve also read multiple warnings to not be tempted to use butter here—as it contains water—and will make the crackers soggy. So stick with oil, y’all!
EK: Yes! Heed Anthony’s warning! I turned the bag and rotated the crackers during the first hour several times and then once or twice before I went to bed. In the morning, I poured them out on a parchment-paper lined sheet pan and baked them for about 40 minutes in a low 250°F oven until they were warmed all the way through, lightly brown and crisp.
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EK: I let them cool completely, and when I tasted them, I was surprised at how dry and crisp they were, and how truly addicting they were.
When I served my Italian version at a party, everyone thought they tasted familiar. No one could quite put their finger on it. Whatever it is, it’s like all the highly seasoned addictive chips on the market—the savory, creamy mouthfeel with the salty, spicy herbs and spices is hard to resist, and I’ll bet you can’t eat just one!
They are also very good made with cheese crackers—or any cracker. You can use the Italian seasoning and buttermilk powder, or try the Ranch version. I’m attaching both recipes below so you can choose your flavor. (Ranch seasoning already has the buttermilk powder in it, so there is no need to add more).
EK: You can also use my Italian Seasoning recipe as a base for all your favorite herbs and spices, including Old Bay Seasoning to make a great oyster and shrimp-dip cracker. Just don’t forget the dry Buttermilk Powder if you aren’t using the Ranch seasoning.
WHAT’S 4 DINNER Q&A
AU: We are entering the Summer Soiree Season, so I thought I’d answer some questions we’ve gotten from you guys lately. If you’ve got a burning question for us, leave a comment, send us a chat in the Substack app, or use the Notes feature on Substack. We’re here for you!
QUESTION: I always forget to chill my wine, beer, champagne, etc. Do I put it in the freezer? In an ice bucket? Which is fastest??
ANSWER: Oooh, when Mama’s thirsty, you better watch out! Let’s get that hooch chilled FAST. First of all, mine and Josh’s technique is to start with a cocktail while the wine chills, but…
The absolute best way to chill your wine (or anything else for that matter) is to put it in an ice bucket with WATER, ICE, and SALT. Yes, I said salt. The ingredient that makes everything better, also chills your wine faster! Since salt lowers the freezing temperature of water (meaning the water can get much colder than 32ºF), it chills whatever’s in it a lot faster.
So fill up any metal vessel: an ice bucket or a metal bowl (even a stand mixer bowl!) with ice. Plunge your bottle(s) into it, then fill it up with water to the neck of the bottle. Add at least a cup of salt to the water bath, and then turn the bottle every 10-20 seconds or so (this disperses the water that has warmed next to the unchilled bottle away from it). You don’t have to turn the bottle—it will still chill in 10 minutes or so—but if you want the job done faster, constantly agitate the bottle to get that baby icy cold within 5 minutes!
QUESTION: I’m sick of the celery and carrots with hummus party platter. Any way to add some ‘oomph’ to my veggie tray??
ANSWER: Well, I think we’ve all learned from Dr. Oz that we don’t call it crudités, amiright?!? JK, it’s always going to be crudités, but pronounce it like crew-DITES, so it’s fancy. :)
First of all, I would say skip the store-bought hummus (unless you’re going to really dress it up!). I mean we’ve all been there, but nothing says IDGAF like a container of Sabra plopped down in the middle of a plastic, divided grocery store veggie tray. Hummus can be delicious, and has its time and place, but like, it’s time to step it up, Becky. Opt for a delish store-bought tzatziki, homemade guacamole, or even a plant-based dip like my Cashew Queso. I made an excellent Green Goddess dip that I’m still tweaking (recipe coming next week!).
The second thing I’ll say about crudités is that we all get into a “veggie platter rut,” right?? Who hasn’t said, “I’m just gonna throw some carrots, celery, bell peppers, and cukes on the plate”?? So let’s think outside the box. Recently I hosted my pals Wyatt & Caroline, and set out the platter above. We have the usual suspects: bell pepper and persian cucumbers, but we also had colorful radishes that I kept the greens on (veggie handles! and edible!), sliced raw fennel, and sugar snap peas. Think of what’s in season at the farmer’s market (ugh that’s so obnoxious, I know), and choose that, because it’s what will taste the very best. And don’t be afraid to add something that’s NOT a vegetable, like a cracker—see above—or a chip, or a cheese straw. Sometimes you just want a little salty/crunchy in between all the vegetable goodness.
The last tip to take your veggies from drab to fab, is to season them. I squeeze lemon juice over them just before serving. Sometimes I’ll sprinkle the veg with herbs, or aleppo pepper, or tart sumac. Avoid salting them, as it will cause the vegetables to give off their water. If you really want to gild the lily, serve your crudités on a bed of crushed ice—they’ll stay extra crisp, and you’ll look like a fine dining pro. Enjoy!
Andrew - don’t dis store-bought hummus. Do dress it up by serving it in a pretty dish. Same with the veggies, cheese cubes, etc that are bought in divided plastic containers. Ditch the black plastic, arrange on a pretty platter, board, etc. Toss the plastic & no one will be wiser. I was reminded of this when I brought potato salad I had bought at a BBQ joint to a potluck. It came in giant styrofoam cups. I moved it to a nice dish b4 serving. People RAVED about how good it was.